What Do People Really Fantasize About? Dr. Justin Lehmiller Reveals Findings from 10,000 Adults.
I'm thrilled to have Dr. Justin Lehmiller, renowned psychologist, sex researcher and author of "Tell Me What You Want," join me to uncover what people really fantasize about based on his groundbreaking survey of over 10,000 adults.
In this fascinating episode, I dive into the hidden world of sexual fantasies with Justin a psychologist who has conducted the largest study on what people actually fantasize about. As someone who works daily with patients struggling with sexual health concerns, I found this conversation incredibly revealing about what's happening in people's minds behind closed doors.
Justin reveals the seven universal fantasy themes that emerge across all demographics, from threesomes and kink to romance and taboo scenarios helping me understand what my patients are likely thinking about but afraid to discuss.
We explore the surprising finding that religiously and politically conservative people often fantasize about the very things they're "not supposed to" do, and how taboos actually amplify excitement through what he calls the "forbidden fruit effect."
One of the most valuable insights I gained was learning that 80% of people report positive experiences when sharing fantasies with partners, and how women who act on fantasies have higher orgasm rates.
We also discussed surprising findings about who people fantasize about most (hint: it's usually people they know, not celebrities), and how factors like age, gender, and culture shape our secret desires. Perhaps most importantly, we addressed how most people think their fantasies are much rarer than they actually are, creating unnecessary shame that impacts sexual wellbeing.
This conversation opened my eyes to just how normal and diverse human sexual fantasies really are. For anyone wondering if their thoughts are "weird" or struggling with shame around their desires, this episode offers both validation and practical insights.
Highlights:
Justin surveyed over 10,000 people to uncover the seven most common sexual fantasy categories.
Conservative people often fantasize about breaking the very taboos they publicly support.
80% of people have positive experiences when sharing fantasies with their partners.
Most people fantasize about people they know rather than celebrities.
Women who act on their fantasies report higher rates of orgasm.
Curious about more honest conversations around sexual health? I encourage you to subscribe to my podcast, for more candid discussions that help you advocate for your sexual wellness.
Do you have questions about sexual health? I always tell my listeners -don't hesitate to discuss your concerns with a qualified healthcare provider who specializes in sexual medicine. Remember: I'm here to educate so you can advocate for yourself.
